Tuesday, January 31, 2012


I just woke up. and I was here. in this shell of a house in the cold. It's freezing here. Ash and rubble and then Him. He was there staring at me. Watching me. It's quiet. the wind blowing through the bare branches. And then... this... Him. There. Just staring. A blank faceless stare. Just staring. Staring. Watching. He sees into me. My thoughts feelings. I should be afraid. I'm not. I'm angry. It's over. But it's not. Why... would they do that to me. Why would I ever think about them doing that. treating me like that. It can't be real. It wasn't real. But at the same time. It feels real. The violation I felt is real, that I still feel. It's real. And I can't brush it off. It won't go away.

I'll just stay here. Hide. Ignore it. Hide. Try to keep warmth in my body. Fuck. It's so fucking cold. His gaze isn't helping. Just staring at me like that. Fuck. I need to get out of here. But I can't move.


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